Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Tough Day

Well, I've had better days. Today I have to stop breastfeeding and I am dissapointed. I know there are some brightsides to it,but I know I will miss this time with Adeline. I had to start a new medication yesterday to help curb my anxiety. Yes, I am a worrier and with the move, the baby, the renovation the sale of the house and the zero money until the house changes hands(like ZERO - not even available credit - ZERO!!!)and now this thing with Clayton at school and trying to mak changes to our day to day life, I guess I'm not handling it well. Well, I think I handle stress fine. I don't really know what stress is suppose to feel like, but I guess mybody does and it says TOO MUCH!! It tells me by making it hard for me to swallow, a lost appetite and a constant reminder that something is the pills. They are a hard transition too becuase they take som getting used to. So, after talking with my doctor, we decided that Adleine has gotten some good boob food and it's better for her to go onformula. It's hard not to feel like a failure or that I will be judged for making this decision but with everything going on, I think it will be better. I'm looking at the positive side. Preston will be happy becuase I can go on the pill again. He wont be happy though because he will realise I can more easily leave the baby with him and ask him to feed her. With the many many things going on right now, passing her to Preston will free me up to do those things, like bringing more routines and structure to our home.
I have a meeting with Clayton at the hospital on Dec 4th and they will just go through our peronal history and stuff. I honstly think they will find nothing significantly wrong with him and they will just tell us a few things that we can be doing at home to help him more at school. I do not see a troubled child. However, now that they have identified him at school, I am afraid of him getting labeled. My dad is a teacher and he had a few strong opinions about it and his fear of Clayton getting labeled. Well, I go to Claytons school today at 2:30 to see him. ALl the parents get a 15 minute observation so hopefully I will see the behaviour she is talking about. Anyways. Next post will be happy:)

Saturday, November 8, 2008


So this house is soooo ugly (this post isn't helping my resolve to stop whining in my blog) nd we are planning on doing many renovations. We tiled the bathroom last weekend and this weekend, we are installing the toilet and sink, with the help of a plumber, and tiling the landry room. It's hard to picture this ugly house, so I took some pictures. You can see I tried to paint the kitchen cablinets, and then we just decided we are going to gut it and smash out the wall to the silly little room beside it and make it a little bigger. Along the back of this house, there are 3 rooms. nd they are all tiny so we will have to smash out some walls somewhere. Today our 'guy' will tell us which one isn't load bearing. This room is the dumbest. It is tiny with a fireplace and a huge set of doors. I lady with the same model house says it is suppose to be the family room. It fits a love seat. Thats really it. So we are going to make it our nook and have it open to the kitchen.

As you can see, I did no cleaning for these photos.
Then there is the livingroom. So long and silly, I don't know what to do with this room. Prestons tv will have to go in the basement. It is too big for the room.

I'll have to post more later, but these are he rooms that hurt methe most. I am not a good at design, so I'm nervous about making the wrong decision. Hopefully, but February, I can post beautiful pics of our new home.

People read my blog?

I was under the impression no one read my blog but I've had 2 new commenters the last few days! Which means, I have to stop whining so much:) So, here is a picture of my beautiful children. They were incredibly loud and mean to eachother yesterday, but look how cte they are when they smile?

Friday, November 7, 2008


So, the human race is suppose to be the most intelligent, right? Thn why are we so stupid and lazy? I wonder why we make fun or scoff at smokers and then go have a Big Mac. You might not, but I do, and I think a lot of other people do to. Poor diet is just as unhealthy as smoking. We do a lot of other dumb things like not exercising even though it is PROVEN to do our bodies good. Or we don't drink enough water because we don't like the taste. It just makes me wonder how smart we really are if we do such harm to our bodies. The crappy thing is I don't want to change. I still want to eat fatty foods...they are YUMMY!! I guess I'll change with my first heart attack. That is something e humans also do is wait for tragity to say I'll be better. We had an experience with CLayton this week, his teacher told us he was going to go for testing because he is loud during quiet time and likes the toys to be put in the spot they belong (huh?) Anyways, for years I've been telling Preston we need more structure in our home. WHere are they going to learn it? We need to all eat at the table at dinner and not leave t until we are done. We need to read our scriptures and make the kids listen. Well, I've been ignored for years and NOW that we've been presented with a problem, he pipes up and says we need to have the tv off more. HELLO...COMMON SENSE??!!
ANyways..dumb humans. When will we learn.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Nursing issues

Adeline is a great baby. She sleeps well and smiles a lot. She isn't fussy in the evenings anymore but she still likes to be held a bit. However, overthe past few weeks I've been unhappy with her eating habits. It started with her pulling off or not staying on very well for the first few minutes. I thought maybe she developed a bad latch. Anyways, I would spray milk everywhere when she pulled/fell off. Now, over the past several days. She will sck for 10 seconds and pull off and yell at me. The other day, she hadn't eaten in 41/2 hours so I knew she was hungry but she did the same thing. She wasn't overly grumpy though so it made me question whether she was even hungry but it had ben over 4 hours. She should have been. I had to get Kayla from school so I didn't have a lot of time to waste. She was getting a litle grumy so I threw some formula into a bottle and she sucked 2 ounces back quick. That made me realize she has a problem with me. SO, now I have to figure it out. Huh.